I was sitting on the sofa the other day next to Jackson and he grabbed my hand to hold it. I snapped this photo because it is what makes it all worth it!
Mother’s Day is rapidly approaching and I take advantage of every opportunity to remind my children of everything I went through to have them. I do this to ensure I get a good gift. My children are not “eye rollers” per se, instead they look at me with a solid stare as to be saying, “Oh no! Not this story again.”
As the years have passed I have found I have become more detailed in my story to ensure they really get a sense of my sacrifice. Things like 12 hours of labor now get the added detail of the fact that Thomas had to suctioned out (fun) and for Jackson, I am always sure to add that I had him plus a kidney stone. (BTW, a Kidney Stone is WAY more painful than labor but that’s just between us ladies. If a man asks, I am sure to say that labor is more painful.) And seriously who has both at the same time? Ugghhh.
While I can appreciate the big public moments as much as the next girl, I must admit my favorite moments are really the more private. The ones that catch me by surprise and keep me thinking how did I get so lucky and how it is possible I have these beautiful children?
Thomas wanted to take this photo of the two of us to post on his Instagram account. It made my day, week, month and year. I love that a photo of us was important (and his most “liked” one to date!) Thomas always comments on how much his friends like me. It makes me so happy to have all the kids over to my house. I adore them.
With Thomas, it is after school when he comes to find me to give me a run down of his day or the way he will come in my room and invite me to watch something on Netflix with him.
Jackson taking his first online chess class last week.
With Jackson, he wants to ensure I will be at his hockey or basketball game. That feeling of being wanted and needed is so precious. At 9:30 when I am exhausted after a long day, it is Jackson inquiring if I will play chess with him. I protest and then remind myself that there will be a day soon where I will long for the opportunity. (BTW on this one, what Jackson is really asking is can I beat you at chess, yet again?) I tell him yes and that I cannot say no to that beautiful face. Jackson’s face literally lights up with delight while he contemplates his current and next moving. It lights up even more when he sees “check mate” in the next few moves.
Jackson looked online to find a chess tutor and his constant thirst for knowledge and improvement in everything he does leaves me in awe.
It all these examples, it is simply the joy in spending time with them as it brings sheer happiness and I realize these moments are fleeting.
As my boys have gotten older, I have noticed that whatever age they are, I absolutely love it and think it can’t get better but is does. As they grow, they become even more interesting, more intelligent and articulate and move amazing and I find myself drawn to their enthusiasm.
As I look back on when they were babies, it seemed so overwhelming and stressful. Now, I can look back and laugh.
Here are a few things I wish I had known…
- Labor has a definite start and end time AND you get drugs. What happens next is really where the pain begins. No one tells you this bit of info.
- Your regular jeans will most likely not fit on the day you leave the hospital. This was a bit of a shock to me. Pack your maternity jeans, just in case.
- In the beginning of your pregnancy you will buy some clothes that look gigantic and you will think this will never fit and then there will come a day when it doesn’t fit because it is too small.
- Don’t bring a three piece outfit for the baby when you leave the hospital. Dressing a moving infant is much more challenging than you think. Don’t believe me, I can share the 45 min of the video of me trying to dress Thomas. We were both crying! To make matters worse, the nurse came in after I had finally gotten the outfit on him and said I needed to undress him because he hadn’t been checked out yet.
- Your newborn baby does not care if all your baby items match. It will not stop him/her from crying.
- Diapers are the best baby gift ever. Yes, better than a blue box.
- You will use the Tiffany silver spoon only once.
- Ditto on the Tiffany three-piece baby place setting.
- Ditto on the children’s silver Tiffany fork and spoon.
- There is sheer panic involved in bringing a baby home from the hospital. I remember thinking how can these people let me leave? Don’t they know I have no idea what I am doing?
- Get your baby dressed and in the car seat ready to go BEFORE you put on the shirt you plan to wear out of the house.
- At some point, your stroller will jam and not collapse when you are trying to get it in the car. This will most likely not happen in your garage but in a public place. Make sure your stroller will fit in the backseat or that you are willing to abandon it in the parking lot.
- At some point you will plan an elaborate Birthday party and your child will be sick with something contagious.
- You will be adamant about seat belts, helmets and safety and the first time your child gets hurt and needs to go to the hospital will be just like people describe, a random accident that wasn’t cause by any dangerous behavior. ( Thomas simply stumbled and hit the coffee table)
- The above will happen the day before you have a professional photographer taking family photos.
- The nicest thing you can say to a pregnant woman who is about to have her baby is “I hope your baby has a small head.”
- Return any baby clothing item that has a lot of buttons. Snaps and Zippers are you friends. Seriously.
- Ditto on anything that requires ironing.
- You will sit in the back seat with your baby and you will feel guilty for making fun of people who you saw doing the same thing.
- When you are pregnant with your 2nd child, you will think it is impossible to love another child as much as your first and yet when that baby arrives, it happens.
- If you go to one of those picture places in the mall, you will buy all the pictures, even if they are terrible because you can’t bear to have a photo of your child thrown away.
- They will be ready for the next step long before you are.
- You will wonder why it is 5:00 and you have been thinking about grabbing something in the fridge like a soda and be perplexed why you never made it to grab one.
- Your baby will start to cry as soon as you step foot in the shower.
- You will have a hard time remembering your life before they were born.